Somebody said “here’s your baby”, and I had barely enough energy to lift my head for a second and see a red squirming creature, and I knew she was okay, and that Husbandito and the doctors were going to take care of her and I could finally get some motherflipping rest after being in labour for what felt like a million years. And I overheard them asking Husbandito what her name was, and he said ‘Penny’ out loud for the first time, and that was the best thing that ever happened to me.
They wheeled a tiny person into my hospital room and I held onto her and we both went to sleep. That was the best thing that ever happened to me.
I finally got to have a shower after lying in bed in my own filth for three days, and then that afternoon somebody came and took my catheter out, and that was the best thing that ever happened to me.
On the sixth day and after jumping through thousands of proverbial hoops, we put our baby girl in the car seat and carried her out through the doors of the hospital. We put her in the car and drove her home. I hadn’t been outside for a week and somehow the world looked very different. That was the best thing that ever happened to me.
Husbandito brought me peanut butter on toast the morning after our first night at home. I hadn’t had much sleep and I was so grateful I almost cried, and that was seriously the best thing that ever happened to me.
Husbandito and I held hands as we walked and pushed our baby girl in a stroller through the streets of Summer Hill and got take away Indian food. That was the best thing that ever happened to me.
I got cold in the night. Husbandito spooned me and I wasn’t a blimp and it felt lovely and that was the best thing that ever happened to me.
Any time I was able to luxuriate in a shower over the next four weeks was the best thing that ever happened to me. Except for the one time that I had a bath. Then that was the best thing.
Penny was drunk on boob juice and laying back in my hands with her arms flopped in what looked like a good position to play air guitar. So obligingly, we made her play air guitar. It was really funny. And then she spewed so hard that it came out her nose. We deserved that. It was the best thing that ever happened to me.
Penny sneezed four times in a row making the most adorable string of ‘achoos’. After the last one she gave an exasperated little sigh of relief. We laughed. I’m pretty sure it was the best thing that ever happened.
I bounced on the ball for forty-five minutes straight at some insane hour of the morning and I thought my back and shoulders were going to explode. Then the babe fell asleep and stayed asleep when I put her in the bassinet and I got to lie down. It was the best thing that ever happened to me.
After a long and tiring morning of crying and fretting (her, not me), the sun came through the lounge room window in the afternoon and the babe and I lay in the lovely warm shaft of light and fell asleep together. It was the best thing that ever happened to me.
Every time Penny rouses she makes a series of elaborate noises and sometimes we unwrap her and then just watch as she grunts and stretches and wakes up. It is always the best thing that ever happened.
Husbandito was changing the babe’s nappy when she did an almighty shart and he was so startled that he leapt backwards. That was the best thing that ever happened.
I put Penny in the baby bjorn for the first time and she didn’t even complain. Then we went all the way to the supermarket and back and she fell asleep. It was the best thing that ever happened. That was about two hours ago.
I’m sure there were many more things but I am starting to get very sleepy myself so my brain isn’t firing on all neurons. The gist of the story is, even when I’m so tired that I want to cry, or frustrated, or sore, everything is pretty great, really.
whatvioladidnext 